" This 'I' Does not exist"

    The term 'I' often used by us has many shades of meaning. The term 'I' actually does not exist! It is only a pronoun used for first person singular and for plural, the term used is 'we'. When child is born it does not posses any name! A name is given by somebody and different persons call the child by different pet names, too. If the name itself is dubious, the pronoun used for that name is also not true. Great sages advise us to drop all name, form and function and see the 'truth'. If the term 'i' does not exist, the term 'we' also does not exist! Thus, both the terms 'i' and 'we' normally used in daily use refers to some person and people, respectively, who are anonymous! Everybody uses the term 'we' for a set of persons whose names, forms, and functions are not explicitly clear; however, the term 'i' is used it refers to a person whose name, form, and function is implied. If the name, form and function is dropped what remains is the 'sat', the 'real person'. As we understand, people use 'i' to impress on others who he/she is; but, actually refer to  whom is the question here. Is it the physical body, or merely a name, or does it mean a person, or his intelligence and mind, or is it merely ego, ahankar? It is definitely the 'ego' (ahankar/ 'aham-ness') that prompts a person to say, "I am so and so, i did this, this, and this, etc.The person is not aware of what he means when he uses this 'i' again and again. 

   Now, another question is: "Where has this i gone when a person is in deep sleep?" One can easily see this 'i' when one is dreaming since happiness or fear is experienced in dreams; there is this 'i' that is visualizing the dream sequences. This small English letter 'i' refers to individualized self, not to the soul, Atman. The capital 'I' is used to refer to the 'Self', the Atman..

  Actually, this concept of 'I' disappears in deep sleep along with the body consciousness; so also, the senses, mind, the intellect. All these appendages of the jiva are withdrawn in deep sleep and a person is quietly at rest in deep sleep. It is the avidya, nascence that the jiva does not realize the fact that it is merged in its true 'Self', the soul or the Atman.  The individual consciousness is awake when all these appendages such as manas, buddhi, ahankar and the indriya are withdrawn or merged in the Atman. A person in deep sleep wakes up refreshed after a good sleep, and as such, he has got the memory of his state of happiness in deep sleep; but he / she is not aware of existence in the world. A person in deep sleep will not know what happened while in deep sleep, He or she sleeps like a log of wood, if not dead, and does not know even if his house is burgled.

    A person attains this state of avidya, ignorance, at birth due to the nature of the material body, an elemental one- of the five elements like water, soil, air, fire and space. It is acquired from the earth, the mother and the father and everything that surrounds the jiva. This can be overcome only by reverting to the pure state of prenatal elemental state of Hydrogen, not even Oxygen, Carbon, and any other lighter gases!

   A person or jiva is said to be emancipated only when it  drops this acquired ahankar 'i' and reverts to pure state. This is mukti to the embodied soul.
   Another version of 'I' is also there. This is the visioning eye, the eye that sees and conveys the objects on the mind screen. Unfortunately, there are two eyes and one has to focus them and get the object in proper vision; however, these eyes are so weak and limited in power that they cannot give the true picture. They give room for aberrations. Most of us say, 'i saw' but cannot explain what is it seen! This is evident in the case of eye witnesses in court rooms. The judge has to dismiss the eye witness since the intelligent advocate brings out the truth or falsehood of what the eyes saw- at near, far or side-ways, etc.
    There is another eye that sees inward. It is at the place between the two eye brows, bhrukuti. This inner eye gives us insight, antar-drushti. It sees inward and gives us a lot of inner meaning, insight. We normally do not use it. It requires yogic practice to use this inner eye and get the vision of the unseen reality of our existence- both inside and outside of us.
   Yet another Vedic version of the eye is akshi-purusha. Brahmasutra explains the eye as the purusha. The person in the eye is the self of all. Every body sees him, self in every eye,because the pupil acts as a mirror. Since what we see is the self, self all, it is said to be the brahman.
   The eyes connect the sun in the heavens with the soul, Atman. Hence I and my "Father in Heavens are one".  tat tvam asi |"The perceiver and the perceived become one", is the principle.