Bereavements

  Somebody jocularly remarked, "Did he have a heart?' when he heard of the sad demise of a friend due to heart attack! Some say, he is so hard-hearted...! He is like a rock, does not respond to sick... He lacks human sympathy, minimum courtesy, etc. etc. This lack of disinterestedness, expression of sympathy or condolences is not an act of uncivility, but a natural response of an attained person, jnyani. When we hear the sad news, we suddenly rush to WhatsApp or Facebook to express our condolences, emotional attachment, feeling, and sympathy. But, do we realize the fact that this will not in any way help unless rush to help with transport, cash and kind? The present Corona days have posed many serious problems and, even dead bodies are not given for ritual cremation rites. This is something heart-rending! However, there is another perspective to this problem, that is of spiritual nature! Our yoga teacher used to tell us to go and sit in meditation as soon as you hear such sad news. Pray for the welfare of the family members, those who live and help them to overcome the grief by physical presence and support! With all these, bereavements are such a thing that make us sad until we forget the whole issue! It is more an emotional issue!

 Whenever we hear the sad news about the death of the close relatives and friends, it is natural that we feel extremely sad and even get shocked when it is highly unexpected! This sadness, bereavement, feeling of loss is due to our attachments (moha), affinity (closeness), and we feel the intensity more when they are our close friends or relatives. This sadness or bereavement is inevitable. However, the Lord says, "One should not grieve for the dead..." The reason given is much stranger. "See, they are already  dead and do not exist, at all!" (See Vishvarupa Darshana and more in Chs. X and XI)  He tells Arjuna that "It is not wise to grieve for those whom one should not grieve" This is a very dilemmatic problem for us. Why should we not grieve when we feel sad? Because, it is an inevitable fact of life! An aspect of the nature, prakruti niyama. Everybody soon forgets these things?

  Now, the problem is not about grieving for the loss, but it's different! It is one of spiritual nature that calls for 'Knowledge of the Self', Atmajnyan! It is common for mortals in the loukika, worldly existence, that one grieves for loss. But, a jnyani has no grievances! For a realized person, gold and piece of rocks are same! That level of equanimity is hard to come? The embodied and embedded soul is in bondage due to the physical body it has created like a nest or earthen pot that is bound to be destroyed. The physical body depending on the breakfast, lunch, snacks and dinner grows and deteriorates with time. The soul, however, is not the perishable or deteriorating? It is eternal, immortal, unborn, and, hence one should realize the true nature of the self. One should not grieve for the inevitable, mortal, perishable body. When a lady went to the Buddha with her grievance for the loss of her child, He asked her to bring some mustard seeds from a family where nobody has died so far!  jatasya maranam hi dhruvam!